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I​’​m Just Here for the Swag

from Blindsight 2020 by Rob Paravonian

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about

A funky, groovy track about my real reason for going to conventions, cons, and expos :-)

lyrics

At least once a year
I attend a big convention
And seeing all the exhibit halls
Is always my intention
I give out my card and pretend
to hear what you have to say
But the dirty truth is I’m at your booth
to see what you’re giving away, cuz

I’m just here for the swag
For the swag! He’s here for the swag!
I’m throwing all the cool stuff I can find
Right in my bag
They're meeting and greeting
While I’m straight up trick-or-treating
I’m just here for the swag
For the swag! He’s here for the swag!
I’m just here for the swag!

The good booths have the big crowds
You’re gonna have to fight ’em
If you want to go home with
all the coolest items
and if they hold out because they doubt
I fit their strategy
I make some cards up, say I run a startup
And wanna do some B2B, cuz

I’m just here for the swag
For the swag! He’s here for the swag!
And if it’s super-dope I just might post
With your hashtag
Tell them they shouldn’t censor me
I’m an influencer
And I’m just here for the swag
For the swag! He’s here for the swag!
I’m just here for the swag!

Strolling through the halls, seeing all the exhibits
If your booth has a giveaway you know I’m gonna hit it
I’m gonna fit it in if I didn’t get it yet, son
Then I’ll leave a divot when I pivot to the next one
Get some! Power bricks and headphones
Carabiner clips with sanitizing hand foam
I’m going home with fabulous prizes
If you’re stuff is that fly I’ll be back in disguises
The sky is the limit, everything is in play
If your logo’s on it I’ma wanna take it away
I didn’t make it that way, this place makes me manic
It’s kind of like a panic when they set up this dynamic
Cuz I got the lanyard, you got the swag
The only thing that’s left to do is put it in my bag
’Til it’s heavy and saggin’ and I’m draggin’ it away
You can nag me but, hey, you know what I’m gonna say

I’m just here for the swag
For the swag! He’s here for the swag!
I’m getting everything from hoodies
to a microfiber rag
There’s no sign I’ll be stopping
I’m doing my Christmas shopping
I’m just here for the swag
For the swag! He’s here for the swag!
I’m just here for the swag!

credits

from Blindsight 2020, track released December 1, 2020

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all rights reserved

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about

Rob Paravonian New York

Known the world over for his viral "Pachelbel Rant" video, Rob Paravonian is a musician and comedian who has performed on Comedy Central, opened for comedy legends George Carlin and Lily Tomlin, and was once called a "deranged bastard child of Tom Lehrer and Joan Baez." ... more

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