Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong

by Rob Paravonian

supported by
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    The tracks are set up as "Side 1" and "Side 2" with a "Bacon Trilogy" in between. I say this because it's on the back cover of the CD packaging but digital downloaders have been surprised and curious as to why on Earth there are three songs in a row about bacon.
    Enjoy!

      $9.99 USD  or more

     

1.
03:36
2.
02:18
3.
4.
5.
6.
02:17
7.
8.
9.
02:06
10.
11.
12.
04:32
13.
14.
02:52
15.
16.
03:59
17.

credits

released June 4, 2013

Arranged and recorded by Rob Paravonian. Victor Varnado appears on Just Us 2, Ann Enzminger appears on G Train, Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong, One Word Answers, and Just Us 2

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Rob Paravonian New York

Known the world over for his viral "Pachelbel Rant" video, Rob Paravonian is a musician and comedian who has performed on Comedy Central, opened for comedy legends George Carlin and Lily Tomlin, and was once called a "deranged bastard child of Tom Lehrer and Joan Baez." ... more

contact / help

Contact Rob Paravonian

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Track Name: G Train
There’s a subway line that all the time
Everybody's always mocking
But that’s just the words of the idiot herd
‘Cause I think it's pretty rocking
You’d realize that if you prized
Individuality
This particular line is one of a kind,
There ain't nothing like the G.
People laugh and say that it should try to go somewhere
But the G Train does it’s own thing, it doesn’t really care

Oh wait, I thought it was coming there for a second.
Guess we gotta wait on the platform
That's all right, that's all right.

“The G Train takes forever to come”
That means it’s just reclusive
“But it’s half the size of other trains”
That just makes it’s exclusive
“The G Train is just too darn slow,
“When’s it gonna come?” Pssh, you don’t know?
“The G Train doesn’t even go to the city!”
No bridge and tunnel crowd? What a pity.
If the G Train doesn’t go there it’s no place that I want to be
You can have the main lines I’ll be riding on the G

This is where it’s at, man, on the G Train
We don’t go to Manhattan, no we refrain
There’s no other subway line that matches
It’s not for the masses, it’s transit in small batches.

That's right, this is artisanal transit right here.
Each ride is unique.
Know what I'm sayin'?

They say the G Train goes nowhere,
Well, I’ve got to beg your pardon
Green Point, Gowanus, Fort Greene,
Bedford Stuy and Carroll Gardens
The G Train will get you there
Tho it might take a while
But when you finally get there
You’re someplace that’s got style
It’s all about Brooklyn and a little bit of Queens
And people who have yet to let this city kill their dreams

All the girls are cuter on the G Train
They’re not mindless commuters with little pea brains
It’s a challenge so the riders must be able
It’s unknown and unstable, like it’s on an indie label

You don’t have to dress up for the G Train
There’s no one to impress so you’ve got free rein
On the G Train you can be however you feel
The G Train keeps it real, it’s like a dive bar on wheels

Riding on the G Train.
No man, we're taking the G. We're not going into Manhattan just to come back out.
Riding on the G Train.
Aw! It's at the other end of the platform! Run!
Riding on the G Train.
Ooh, let's get out here, this is my pirogue spot!
Riding on the G Train.
It's not really Queens, it's Long Island City, that's like Kenosha.
Riding on the G Train.
Ogee! Ogee! Ha ha, get it?
Riding on the G Train.
No, not "OG," "Ogee," like from Magilla Gorilla. You don't know Magilla Gorilla?
Riding on the G Train.
You don't… get off the G Train!
Riding…
Wait, it just stopped?
Track Name: Contrarian
Come on!
You always disagree!
I know a guy, he makes me quite irate
Anything I like he automatically hates
He’s a contrarian,
You can never be right!
He’s a contrarian
If all of his friends say they like a flick
He’ll say it’s lame just to be a dick
He’s a contrarian,
“I don’t have to see the movie.”
He’s a contrarian
He’ll argue for days on end
Just because to him that’s fun
Never ending!
He’s a contrarian

He’ll say the opposite thing just to egg you on
If the whole room is pro, you know he’s gonna be con...
Khan!!
He’s a contrarian,
Everybody’s always wrong!
He’s a contrarian
He never takes time to think things through
Automatic!
He just disagrees because he thinks he’s better than you
He’s a contrarian,
“Pfff, yeah, you’d think that.”
He’s a contrarian
He could score more points than you and somehow say he won
“I played smarter.”
He’s a contrarian
Watch him now!

None of his beliefs are held deeply
It’s all on the surface!
Blindly choosing the opposite takes no thought
It’s so predictable!
If all of his friends became contrarians like him
He’d say, “oh, that’s what you are? Then I’m not.”

He’ll spend all day quoting useless facts,
All of his videos are Betamax
Betamax!
He’s a contrarian,
“It’s a superior technology”
He’s a contrarian
“It’s not that inconvenient.”
Any agreement just makes him tense
So he’ll argue things that don’t make sense
He’s a contrarian,
“I just don’t think puppies are that cute.”
No!
He’s a contrarian
“Sunshine? Bah!”
He would join the NRA just to say he doesn’t like guns
Bwoh! Bwoh! Bwoh!
He’s a contrary...
He’s a contrary...
A very, very contrarian
Contrarian!
Track Name: I'm Not Afraid of Zombies
An idea that has really spread
Is people could become undead
That a virus or a fungus
Could make zombies walk among us

Movies games and TV shows
Helped this zombie craze to grow
Now everywhere you go these days
The zombie trend is all the rage

Everywhere I look
There’s a new story or a book
That uses zombies as a way
To show society’s decay

But with zombie antagonists
There’s something everyone has missed
An omission pretty glaring
See, zombies aren’t that scary

‘Cause zombies don’t run
They’re easy to flee from
They don’t use shotguns, That’s why I’m not afraid of zombies
They’re not too smart
They don’t use golf carts
I’ve seen worse at Wal-Mart, That’s why I’m not afraid of zombies anymore.

People call me cavalier
But I think that it’s pretty clear
That I could overpower
A thing that walks one mile-per-hour

Maybe they’d be scarier
If they weren’t so inferior
If they had some more ambition
Maybe became politicians

But zombies don’t make plans
They’re about as dumb as plants
And their skills aren’t well-regarded
They’re just slowly moving targets

I don’t mean to gloat
You could defeat them with a moat
If there’s a zombie on my lawn
I think the most I’d do is yawn

They may be gory
But they’re truly boring
I’ll just out in bumpy flooring, that’s why I’m not afraid of zombies
You can burn ‘em
And they just murmur
They’re slow learners, That’s why I’m not afraid of zombies
They look hungover
Even when sober
They’re easy to run over, That’s why I’m not afraid of zombies
I’m not lying
I won’t be dying
They’re barely trying,
That’s why I’m not afraid of zombies anymore

People would say that they fear zombies,
if you took a poll
But I think what they really fear
is a world out of control
Zombies aren’t too scary,
I mean, heck, they barely move
But the fact we can’t survive alone
is what they really prove
A symbol of our dependence,
and that’s a source of tension
Needing other people
is something we don’t like to mention
So fear a war or plague,
or societal breakdowns
But don’t fear any zombies,
just mow those mothers down

They may look intense
But they’re quite dense
They don’t play defense, that’s why I’m not afraid of zombies
Their brains are tiny
If they get behind me
I’ll throw out something shiny, that’s why I’m not afraid of zombies
They can’t do addition
Or make decisions
They have bad vision, that’s why I’m not afraid of zombies
I’m not playing
I’ll be zombie slaying
They’re already decaying, that’s why I’m not afraid of zombies anymore.
Track Name: Creepy, Creepy Love
I saw you on the subway
You were all alone
You gave me a quick glance
So I followed you home
You started walking quickly
When I turned down all the same streets
Pretty soon we both were sprinting
‘Til you ran into your building
You thought you’d lost me at your door
Then the lights went on on the third floor
Now I know where you live
And all I want to give you is my love
My creepy, creepy love

I don’t like your doorman
He always tells me that you’re gone
I’m just trying to get your shoe size
For this little thing that I’m working on
Why must you hide from me
Can’t you let me inside I’ll be
A gentleman you won’t get hurt
I just want to smell your shirts
You’re faking this whole hard edge
I’ve been through your garbage
And these charges filed are frivolous
‘Cause all I want to give you is my love
My creepy, creepy love
All I want to give you is my love
My creepy love

Why can’t you feel my yearning
I am literally burning
I mean literally, I lit myself on fire
I’m the fuel you’re the matches
If you’d sift through these ashes
Maybe the thing you’d catch is my desire
And my creepy love.
I’m a hunka hunka burning creepy love

I’ve seen you with that new guy
The one that lives uptown
I don’t think that you should see someone
Who won’t for much longer be around
And I don’t like that place you work
I show up and they go berserk
I only want to see you
To dress like you and to be you
I want you unobstructed
So don’t think of it as ‘abducted’
Oh, that just sounds too negative
Girl all I want to give you is my love
My creepy, creepy love.
My staring-at-you-too-long-in-public love
My standing-outside-your-window-in-a-rainstorm-with-no-umbrella love
My creepy love
Track Name: Tech Support For Mom & Dad
I’m doing tech support for Mom & Dad
‘Cause I’m from the freaking future
Every time I visit them
I have to fix their darn computer
They should have a service plan
But they’re too frugal
They think I know my stuff
But I just use google
(Seriously, just google the problem and you’ll find a solution out there somewhere. But don’t go to Yahoo Answers, those people are idiots).

But I really should help Mom because
She helped me with college
And since I have a Lit degree
I have to prove I have some useful knowledge
And it gives me the chance to go in and erase all those
Old embarrassing family photos
(You know the ones, where you’re naked, taking a bath, in the sink. Try to find it now, I put it in a protected directory and you don’t have the right permissions! Ha ha ha ha!)

Tech support for Mom & Dad
Whenever I visit them they get glad
‘Cause I’m the only geek they had
Tech support for Mom & Dad
Tech support for Mom & Dad
Tech support for Mom & Dad
Track Name: Dial Up Days
There was a time when going on line
Was something few people could do
You needed a computer and a telephone
A modem and an ISP too
You paid for your hours and there wasn’t much power
And at home was where you had to stay
‘Cause you could only make a call
when you were plugged in a wall
Back in the dial-up days

And not only that, to comment or chat
You had to find a Usenet feed
Special software was needed if you wanted to read it
And access was not guaranteed
There was always a lag ‘cause servers would drag
So flame wars took so long to blaze
If you were an online jerk
You had to put in the work
Back in the dial-up days

Oh, it was aggravating to disable call waiting
So you wouldn’t get kicked off line
And heaven forbid you traveled out of town
Where a local access number was impossible to find

Then they’d initiate a new software update
And the progress bar would make your eyes glaze
It took forever to download ‘em
With your 56k modem
Back in the dial-up days
Sometimes you couldn’t get through and video barely moved
Back in the dial-up days
You may giggle and scoff, at least we could turn it off
Back in the dial-up,
where everything took a while, but
Those were the dial-up days.
Track Name: Just Us 2 (feat. King Supernuts II)
Girl I just want you
Yeah girl!
i want a world for just us two
Ha ha ha, yeah!
I wish my whole world were the two of us
All right, let’s do this
Hey man, this song is sort of personal, I don’t think it needs a guest rapper.
Ha ha. Incorrect.

Girl, you’re the best thing in the world
Yeah girl!
And I don’t want anyone but you
He doesn’t want anyone but you
He wants to be alone with you… and I’m here too
When I look deep into your eyes
Your eyes
You are all I see
That’s right, you’re all he sees
There’s only you and him… and me
I want to take you away
let’s go!
To a place where we can finally stay
Ha ha!
In each others arms all night
Yeah, let’s all go away tonight
What?
I’ll be there rappin’ to make the mood right

I wish there only me and you
And me!
I want a world with just us two
Or three!
No!
I wish the whole world were the two of us
Yeah, just the two of us
We’re all alone just you, and us

Girl, I’m sorry for my friends
Yeah, they’re terrible
Sometimes they can’t take a hint
His friends are dense, I tell ‘em time and again
How lame they are but it never sinks in
Take my hand and run with me
Where you goin’?
Hurry!
I want us to be free
Did he forget to text? That’s probably what happened
I guess I’ll stop up at his weekend cabin
Now that we’re finally alone
Hey!
Oh, come on!
Oh, baby, don’t go home
Where’s she going?
Don’t you know I’d rather be with you?
Yeah girl, he’d rather be with you
Some people, you know, you just can’t get through

Girl I just want you
That’s all we want girl
I want a world for just us two
Just us girl, in our own world
I wish my whole world were the two of us
Two of us girl, it’s a must girl, who ya trust girl? Just us, girl

There’s so much I want to say
Don’t think, man, just do it!
But certain things get in the way
Come on, man up, fight through it
I know you really hate my crew
Yeah, you hate… Who… Wait, what are you talking about?
I know it’s hard to deal
Do you mean KT? You must mean KT
We’re always riding with a third wheel
I know you don’t mean me
I’d ditch them in a second just for you
What! Oh, hell no, man! Hell no!

Girl I just want you
Oh, so you think you can just… well fine!
I want a world with just us two
I got better things to do with my time
I wish the whole world were the two of us
Fine son, that girl, you can have her
Good luck on a pop song without a guest rapper
Oh, that’s what you’re doing? Two years together, man! And you’re throwing it away for a girl you have to croon to?
I can’t believe you finally got rid of that guy. Where did he come from, anyway?
The record company sent him to rap on my first single and he never left.
Track Name: Gimme a Strip
You just sizzle
In the morning I've got to have you next to my toast and eggs
Toast and eggs
I've got to have you, if I have to like a dog I'll beg
I'm begging for it
And in the afternoon I want you in between to pieces of bread
Let's make a sandwich
At night when I sleep thoughts of you creep through my head
All night long

I wanna take you and soak you in my salty brine
And when you're cured I'll be sure you're mine
I wanna lay you down and make you sizzle and pop
I wanna fry a whole pound 'cause I just can't stop

Gimme a strip, gotta get a strip of you
Oh yeah, gimme a strip, gotta get a strip of you
Gimme a strip, a salty little strip of you
It'll get me through, yeah
Gimme a strip, gotta get a strip of you

Everybody's telling me that you're no good for me
It's just not healthy
They say my cholesterol shouldn't be 373
That's way too high
But how can you be wrong when your strong flavor feels so right?
The mouth wants what the mouth wants
You're meaty and you're greasy and you please me with every bite.
Tastes so good

I wanna lock you in a room and smoke you for days
Slice you thick or thin or in so many ways
I know you're to blame for my insane behavior
But I'm a slave to your savory flavor

Gimme a strip, a salty little strip from you
Oh baby, gimme a strip, a fat meaty strip from you
It's what I need baby, gimme a strip, a salty little strip from you
Oh yeah, gimme a strip, gotta get a strip from you

Some people say that you've got too much fat
But that doesn't faze me 'cause you're tasty like that
I've never been so sure about how I felt
The reason you're not kosher is god wants you for himself
He's a jealous god

Gimme a strip, I gotta get a strip from you
It'll get me through now
Gotta get a strip, a tasty little strip from you
Oh yeah, I said gimme a strip, a fat little strip from you
Come on, I need it! Gimme a strip, gimme a strip from you
Oh, gimme a strip.
Track Name: Applewood
I see you eyeing me at the grocery store
You got some just last week and now you've come back for more
You've tried to cut me out but you just can't stay away
Four out of Five gods say I'm bad but you want me anyway

By the time I get inside your mind it's already too late
If you get one whiff of my you know that you can't wait
To taste my applewood

Travel 'round the world you'll find I'm big from town to town
I'm in breakfast lunch and dinner, baby, you can't hold me down
I can be in a hobo skillet or in a martini glass
Or wrap me around shrimp embrouchette and I'll kick some high class ass

I'll pummel any pastry, I'll bury wine and cheese
People want me so bad they'll get down on their knees
To taste my applewood

From the Northeast to the West Coast, and all the way down south
I make people happy when they put me in their mouth
My smoky flavor will take you for a ride
If you want me you just have to open wide

And taste my applewood.
Track Name: I Don't Want To Be Your Turkey Bacon
I was just leftover poultry, so I was happy when you chose me
And I did my very best to suit your taste
And now you say you need me, but every time you eat me
I see the disappointment in your face

Excitement wasn't your plan when you first laid me in your pan
I knew you were just trying to be smart
You didn't want to take the chance, so you gave up on romance
To be with someone safer for your heart

And I don't want to be your turkey bacon
I don't want to be the one you settle for
Every time you taste me I don't want to see
That you're wishing I were something more

My heart goes through the wringer when I see your eyes linger
On the breakfast menu at the restaurant
You wish your life were grander, but you've lowered your standards
Because you think you can't have what you want

And I don't want to be your turkey bacon
I don't want to be the one you settle for
When your taste buds I am kissing, you'll just think something's missing
And you'll be wishing I were something more

And I don't want to be your turkey bacon
I don't want to be the one you settle for
I'll always be second fiddle to whatever's on your griddle
And you'll be wishing I were something more.
Track Name: I Love Decoupage
My coffee cup was plain on the side
I tried to hide it but the space was too wide
So my idea was to try trickin’ it out
So it’ll be stickin’ out when I stick it in my mouth
But I didn’t want to do the same old thing
With the gold bling or stones, like some old ho’s ring
So I grabbed magazines
and started looking for scenes
Of things that had some kind of meaning to me.
I remix ‘em and mash ‘em, with glitz and with flash
I customize and my fly style hurts your eyes
It’s a surprise when you realize it’s something I made
My mug is one-of-a-kind
and your mind has been played
I could play all day with the clip art and lacquer
Customizing my [stuff] I’m a houseware hacker
And now my cup is covered with a cool collage
It’s fly and that’s why I love Decoupage

I rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it anyway that I want
I rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it anyway that I want

All my life I’ve been decoupaging
I could go pro bro, it could pay for my lodging
I’m a decoupaging dervish,
the competition’s nervous
‘Cause they know I could stick a picture
into any surface
I went to a strip club I even decoupaged ass
The girls were breathing hard
like they was in Lamaze class
I’m the master of plastering pictures
If I wrote a handbook that [stuff] would be scripture
Get your ass out my face, you can’t keep pace
With your kittens and lace your [stuff]’s a disgrace
Your place is back in a bed and breakfast lobby
Decoupage is my life, to you it’s a hobby
I could probably decoupage your face
without you knowing
I could decoupage an ant or the side of a Boeing
And that 747’s fly fuselage will be my homage
‘Cause I love Decoupage

I rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it anyway that I want
I rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it
Rip it and stick it anyway that I want
Track Name: Just One Day
The date is set, invitations sent
The deposit on the dress cost us 3 months rent
Photographers, videographers,
we’ve hired the whole crew
We’ve been at this crap for 6 months
and there’s still so much to do
My fiancé, who I believe has gone insane
Squeezes her upper thighs and says
“you and I have to address this now!
There’s no way that on our very special day
we’ll be up there on display
looking like two very dressed up cows!”

So I gotta work out for my wedding,
these pounds I’ve got to start shedding
I need a trainer that’s a real hard ass,
I can’t show up like a lard ass
If I don’t lose weight I’ll be in trouble
My girl will hire two body doubles
So I’ve got to find a way
To look good for just one day.

First day out, I ran a mile
Not all at once because I had to rest for a while
I did six pushups, and then I did a crunch
I did two deep knee bends
and then threw up my lunch
I’m trying but I feel like I’m dying
I’d much rather be frying up doughnuts
in a big vat of molasses
Then I see the crowd
while we’re up there exchanging vows
There’s about a thousand people
staring straight at our asses

So we gotta work out for the wedding
Or the photos will be too upsetting
It’s not really about vanity
We just don’t want to look like two manatees
We’ll be stuck with those photos for years
We’ll show them to all of our peers
And we’d like to be able to say
We looked good for just one day.

We’re doing Yoga we do spin class
We just ran a 5K and we both came in last
I’m walking more, I take the stairs at work
And every day I sweat through seven shirts
I’m take fat burners and other supplements
My heart is pounding, I’ve never been so tense
I’m losing motivation ‘cause this is all for show
Can’t wait ‘til I get married and I let myself go
When I put on that ring, I’m gonna let myself go

At the rehearsal dinner the pastor is prayin’
My girl and I are treating it
like it’s a pre-bout weigh in
I won’t even touch a salad
while everyone else is chowing down
I’m popping diuretics
I think I can drop ten more pounds
At the chapel someone hands me an apple
And I have to grapple
with the urge to through up on sight
While my bride is looking very glassy-eyed
When we’re standing side-by-side the two of us
Can barely stand upright

But we gotta work out for the wedding
Even though we’ll both be forgetting
Every detail of this day
‘Cause we’re wasting away
We feel like we’re both gonna drop
But our friends told us that we look hot
And at least we can finally say
We looked good for just one day
We looked good for just one day.
Just one day!
Track Name: One Word Answers
I come home and I know
That something is the matter
When I get in you don’t join in
With our normal idle chatter
Deep inside of me the desire to flee is stirred
‘Cause when I ask you anything you answer with just one word

Hey babe, how’s it going?
Fine.
How was your day?
Good.
Oh crap. Um, what are your views on gun control?
Varied

One Word Answers, this is gonna be bad
One Word Answers, why is she so damn mad?
One Word Answers, I know I should run
‘Cause I’m getting one word answers from you

I’ll never find what’s behind
This drama I just got trapped in
Because it could be literally
Anything that has ever happened
It could be something I said, a TV show
Or a dream that’s causing this mess
I’ll throw out some guesses, baby, just blink twice for yes

Is it what I said about your mother coming to visit?
Is it because I’ve been working late all night? Is it the car?
You wanna go for a ride in the car?
<slap>
Ow!

One Word Answers, this could go on all night
One Word Answers, I would rather just fight
One Word Answers, I’d rather get none
Instead of one word answers from you

I’d rather have a riot than unbearable quiet
While I’m walking through this field full of mines
‘Cause all the words she doesn’t say will come back anyway
At the absolute worst possible time

You want to talk now, while the cab is waiting to take me to the airport for a work trip and you had ALL LAST NIGHT TO TELL ME WHY YOU WERE PISSED!?!?

One word answers, like a fart in the room
One word answers, each word spells your doom
One word answers, I should eat a gun
When I get one word answers from you
One world answers, one word answers

I'm so glad we got this all out into the open and I really feel like we can move on and grow as people. Don't you think we should be people who are in relationships where we feel more free? And I know it only took six hours but it was six hours well spent, don't you think?
Whatever.
Track Name: I Poop Gold
People listen to me 'cause I'm a B-list hottie
I got a rockin' body so people look my way
And since I get attention everybody wants to mention me
In my head that makes me think that I have things to say

You may think I'm lame but you know my name
And this fame took no work to achieve.
I don't know why, I don't have to try
That's why I have been lead to believe

I poop gold, I'm so interesting
I poop gold, I don't need to think
I poop gold, my job is being me
I poop gold, I get paid handsomely
And I'm great is all I've ever been told
I poop gold

People think that I just party but I work really hard
Last week I just started a new workout routine
But I do more than dance I'm trying to advance the world
I tweeted to my fans that it is not nice to be mean

I have no real skill All I do is chill
And I'm still making millions a year.
I don't wonder how my success is allowed
There's no doubt, no, the reason is clear

I poop gold, I'm so adored yeah
I poop gold, must be my aura
I poop gold, the public wants more of me
I poop gold, I could never be boring
And my escapades will never get old.
I poop gold.

I believe my every musing has mass appeal
If I'm ever a bitch I'm just keeping it real
With all of these people watching me
I must be everything everybody wants to be

I poop gold, you may think I'm grating
I poop gold, but my life gets good ratings
I poop gold, do you care who I'm dating?
I poop gold, then you're participating
And if you don't get me then I just think you're old
I poop gold.

I poop gold, I'm a phenomenon
I poop gold, I ramble on and on
I poop gold, I've got it going on
I poop gold, as long as my show is on

I poop gold, yeah yeah
I poop gold...
Track Name: I Broke All Your Stuff
I broke all your stuff since you've been gone
Then I threw it out on to the lawn
I can't make you stay
I can't rekindle your desire
But I can take the stuff you left
And light it all on fire

I told all my nieces your were dead
To get the thought of you out of my head
You said that you needed time
You said you needed space
Now I need to take my pictures of you
And scribble out your face

You'll say that I'm a petty fool
You'll say I'm immature
But you said it was over
And now I'm just making sure
And as soon as that guy from Craigslist comes
and takes away your couch, I'll be sure
Track Name: On Our Side
Welcome back to the countdown, this is Sean Ryecrisp here with you. Now I’m not really supposed to editorialize or give my opinions–it’s not that kind of a show–but this next band I have a real problem with because it was created by a SuperPAC, a political action committee. Now those are the people that spend all kinds of money on campaigns trying to buy elections and now apparently they’ve created a boy band in order to try to infiltrate pop music to get their message through. And I think that crosses some sort of a line and I can’t help…
Oh, I’m getting a message here that says the SuperPAC in question is now a major sponsor of Countdown so, hey, I guess I’m all for it!
Debuting at number three this week is the hot new boy band One Way Forward, this is On Our Side:

This world is filled with rumors and stories
And we’re here to tell you some more, yeah
We’ll blur the facts and stretch the truth
Because you’re worth fighting for
We’ll spend all of our time and most of our money
Trying to get our message to you
‘Cause if you hear what we say enough times
It’ll sound true

We’re gonna get you all riled up
And take you for a ride
‘Cause we’ll do anything
To get you on our side
We’re gonna make you hate someone
We’re gonna fill your head with lies
‘Cause we’ll do anything
To get you on our side

Don’t ask use where we got all this money
‘Cause we’re gonna spend it all on you, girl
So take our hands and come with us
We’re building a brave new world
We’ll do anything we can
To try to get you to care
That’s why wherever you look
We will be there

We’re gonna push your buttons girl
With all the rumors we’ve implied
‘Cause we’ll do anything
To get you on our side
We won’t bother with the truth
And we hope that you’ll abide
‘Cause we’ll do anything
To get you on our side

Girl, our message is too polished to ignore
You’ll buy in though you don’t know who we work for
We’ve done research so we know
How to infiltrate your mind
‘Cause we’ll do anything
To get you on our side

We’ll distract you with our show
While our rich investors hide
‘Cause we’ll do anything
To get you on our side
We’re gonna make you hate someone
We’re gonna fill your head with lies
‘Cause we’ll do anything
To get you on our side
Track Name: Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
don't try to block it,
'Cause your hand's not doing any good
Sitting in your pocket

Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
Don't take no jive.
If you're not using your jazz hand
Why are you alive?

So many people living like they're in a trance,
Just hit 'em with your jazz hand and make 'em dance

Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
You've got to Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong

Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
You've got to let it speak,
'Cause you ain't got nothing worth saying
If your jazz hand's weak.

Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
Don't leave any doubt,
Make people take notice
When your jazz hand is out.

Don't pay any mind to those who say that you're not hip
Just whip your jazz hand out and let it rip.

Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
You've got to Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong

If you let it atrophy there's no going back you'll be
Another nameless person in the crowd
Your jazz hand will protect you, it can make the world respect you
So keep your jazz hand out and keep it proud.

Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
You've got to Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong

Solo

No, you can do no wrong
If you Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong
No, you can do no wrong
If you Keep Your Jazz Hand Strong...